Regarding "The Mom Stays in the Picture" Phenomenon

Ok, I might be late to this Aha-Moment party, but I know I’m not the only one.

Moms, have you seen this?! The Mom Stays in the Picture is an October 6th blogpost written by Allison Tate that relates her experience with hating to be in pictures because she never feels happy with how she looks.
 
Quick question ladies: how often have you ducked out of a picture that was finally being taken of you, because you felt greasy, chubby, unfashionable, gross, exhausted, bitchy, puffy and/or zitty? What's that you say? One bazillion times? Yeah, me too.  

My mom mentioned that a woman was on Katie Couric last week and she really wanted me and my sisters to look it up because it was pretty profound. So I Googled it this morning, teared up because I TOTALLY GOT IT, and then decided to get the message out to as many people as possible because it's SO MUCH BIGGER THAN PROFOUND!

Since sharing it on my own Facebook feed at 8 a.m. it’s been shared numerous times and several friends and family have written the same teary-eyed-goose-bump-inducing comments that I thought myself: “Wow. That is me!”

 
Does this sound familiar? I am forever complaining to my husband that I'm never in pictures. He always corrects me and says, "no, you never WANT to be in pictures" to which I yell "you only take the camera out in the most unflattering circumstances for me!!". And it's true. He does. Take Saturday mornings as a perfect example. My 5yo and/or 7yo is doing something super cute with me. Steve takes out the camera and aims and I yell STOP! Why? Well, since it's a non-work day I am inevitably greasy-faced and crusty-eyed, wearing a ratty tanktop, and always with my hair piled on the top of my head. I may or may not have coffee stains on me may be wearing unflattering glasses. But guess what? THAT'S ME! And that's how they know me and (still) love me. 

 

Me (feeling too exposed and roly and dough-y and greasy) and D finishing a really, really hard lego vehicle, but look at our pride!!

G and me (feeling crusty-eyed and greasy in the a.m.) but look at how funny something is!

 

It seems that no one ever feels good about themselves, especially in a society that Photoshops already “beautiful” models (remember Dove’s mind-blowing Evolution of Beauty commercial http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYhCn0jf46U ?). Couple that feeling of “not-ever-pretty-enough” with a new mom who is in that state of first year sleep-deprived chaos, or a mom who has just not been able to lose the baby weight, or a mom who has just not been able to find time for a haircut, or a mom who only has out-dated too-tight clothes, or a mom who has just not felt GOOD about herself for whatever reason, and BANG! You have the recipe for never wanting to be in a picture and therefore ERASING YOUR OWN PARTICIPATION IN YOUR FAMILY'S HISTORY!!

The amount of pictures we have of my mom with her hand up, face posed in the formation of her yelling "NO!" far outnumber the photos we have of her being candid or posing (If I can find one, I'll post for sure). We have joked about this in my family for years. And my aunt does it and my sisters both do it and my friends do it and ohmygod what are we doing?!

Moms, I'm talking to you: SNAP OUT OF IT AND GET IN THAT PICTURE! You are YOU! Embrace it.
 

Kudos to Allison Tate (@AllisonState) for making this into something that we moms need to take seriously. For all the moms who feel embarrassed of what they look like, remember Allison’s sentiments: you may not be “perfect” for your child/ren to look at, but you are perfectly their mother.

All the best,

Ssy